5. One night at Jazzfest with Maggie - the first time I went. We spent the day in the sun, dancing at the African stage, drinking iced herbal teas...we heard Van Morrison and Sarah Maclachlan...we were pooped! Then afterwards, over to some friends of her parents house for my first crawfish party - I think we both fell asleep at their house before it was even time to leave. It was in that trip that I discovered my hair was curly and that being whoever we are was beautiful! (1996)
4. The night on a ferry boat from Greece to Italy - I stood at the front of the boat, looking up at the stars until sailors from the captains deck called down to me and invited me up to watch from their lookout. It was amazing, the sky was bigger than I'd ever known it to be, I saw my first shooting star that night, and finally understood that there was something so beautiful in having such a quiet moment alone, keeping it in your heart forever. (1996)
3.. The night Brian surprised me in Chicago...we were supposed to have a phone date and he kept texting me and putting it off and finally he called, I looked out my window - and instead of being in Denver, he was right there on Argyle street. I'd never felt as loved, romantic movie like - AND after missing him for the first month we were apart, I was overjoyed to see him again. (2006)
2. The night my first play - David's Redhaired Death - opened. My family was all there, Aly was there, my mentor Andrea was there, the actresses were amazing. It was the beginning of my directing career, and the cast party afterwards at my house was great fun! All around - combined my love for art, passion for directing, and family and friends! (2002)
1. Last night - May 30, 2008 - the inaugural fundraiser for mine and Brian's brand new company - Pure High Arts, LLC. The event was so much fun, all the wonderful friends and strangers who were there - united in their love and support of good art, good theatre, and new endeavors. We were overwhelmed by the support from the community, and the reaffirmation of how when the time and the people are right - the world opens its arms to you. This is the right project for us, right now, and our future is wide open and wonderful! (2008)
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Salut!
I need to take just a minute to give the universe and every person in it a big hug! There are so many brilliant quotations running through my head right now...
"I've always relied on the kindness of strangers..." - Tennessee Williams
"At the moment of commitment, the universe conspires to assist you" Goerthe
Just a very few short months ago - I sat at a table with three brilliant artists and dear friends, including my very own most beautiful beloved - and we decided that now was the right time, we were going to leap in and commit to producing our own play and taking it to festival in...IRELAND! You get the right people together, at the right time, and magic happens.
From that point, B. and I started our own production company - Pure High Arts, LLC - and we sat down to raise some money. Tomorrow night is our very first fundraiser - A Night with the Zoo - we're hosting a benefit and without nonprofit status or a name that anyone (yet!) recognizes - we've already been donated a space, wine, terrific local beer from Breckenridge Brewery , and food by one of my favorite Denver restaurants - Dazzle Restaurant and Jazz. On top of that, we've had almost 30 outstanding prizes donated for a drawing that will last all night - AND we've put together a promotional video on the project. Friends and family have been pouring in with their support, both financial, emotional, and word of mouth - AND yesterday we had our very first press in the Westword - an excellent Denver newspaper!
The people that have opened their hearts to us, giving their skills, their time, and their money astound me. The buzz that this has already generated, and the amazing creative impetus that is swirling all around us amaze me. I am so grateful, so thankful - and so certain that this project is exactly the right thing at the right time. I hope you will all join us on this journey to create the art that we want to see -
And hey - at the end of the day - as if all of this isn't enough - I'm going to Ireland to put on a play that I directed!
...speaking of directing, on another note - I'm also directing a short piece for the TCG conference in two weeks! ACK! I thought moving to Denver was about getting to finally be with my beloved...who knew that it would turn out to be the city of my dreams!
"I've always relied on the kindness of strangers..." - Tennessee Williams
"At the moment of commitment, the universe conspires to assist you" Goerthe
Just a very few short months ago - I sat at a table with three brilliant artists and dear friends, including my very own most beautiful beloved - and we decided that now was the right time, we were going to leap in and commit to producing our own play and taking it to festival in...IRELAND! You get the right people together, at the right time, and magic happens.
From that point, B. and I started our own production company - Pure High Arts, LLC - and we sat down to raise some money. Tomorrow night is our very first fundraiser - A Night with the Zoo - we're hosting a benefit and without nonprofit status or a name that anyone (yet!) recognizes - we've already been donated a space, wine, terrific local beer from Breckenridge Brewery , and food by one of my favorite Denver restaurants - Dazzle Restaurant and Jazz. On top of that, we've had almost 30 outstanding prizes donated for a drawing that will last all night - AND we've put together a promotional video on the project. Friends and family have been pouring in with their support, both financial, emotional, and word of mouth - AND yesterday we had our very first press in the Westword - an excellent Denver newspaper!
The people that have opened their hearts to us, giving their skills, their time, and their money astound me. The buzz that this has already generated, and the amazing creative impetus that is swirling all around us amaze me. I am so grateful, so thankful - and so certain that this project is exactly the right thing at the right time. I hope you will all join us on this journey to create the art that we want to see -
And hey - at the end of the day - as if all of this isn't enough - I'm going to Ireland to put on a play that I directed!
...speaking of directing, on another note - I'm also directing a short piece for the TCG conference in two weeks! ACK! I thought moving to Denver was about getting to finally be with my beloved...who knew that it would turn out to be the city of my dreams!
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Strange Phenomenon
I am almost 6 feet tall, weigh around 160ish pounds, I've got big, crazy, curly hair and I've been known to be pretty loud - and strangely, I've found that in Colorado, I'm kind of invisible. Weird. This has never happened to me before.
Last weekend though I went to my friend Kate's birthday where I ran into a girl that I've met FOUR INDIVIDUAL times. Every time we've met, I've introduced myself to her, reminded her of the last time we met - and we've even taken a 5 hour acting workshop together, AND sat next to her during lunch and chatted. We have mutual friends, we're part of a small community - and YET - she continues to look at me as though she's never seen me before.
That's not the only instance. I find myself constantly reminding people of the last time we met. In fact, on Wednesday, I ran into a woman who remembered me first (embarassingly...although, at least I DID REMEMBER HER) and I wanted to kiss her on the face.
It's a strange thing - I know that I'm not quite the same boisterous, in your face girl that I used to be. I'm much calmer, perhaps even more diminutive these days. And the truth is, I'm dating an amazing man who is sort of a giant among the people he knows - he's kind and fun, well liked and respected...and perhaps I pale a little bit next to him, for the time being, my being new and all...
What's even weirder is the sheer number of strangers who feel like it's appropriate to tell me that I'd better be good enough for him...that they had hoped to be his girlfriend...and the like. Weird, right? Is it just me? Or is just not the South anymore?
Just a little ranting, please excuse me - it's just that these are the kind of behaviours that it's not exactly polite for me to call out - I could say something like, "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T REMEMBER ME? ARE YOU STUPID?" or "EXCUSE ME??!! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHAT KIND OF GIRLFRIEND TO BE? IS THAT ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS?" But I don't...I'm a good Southern girl - so I'll vent it here...for the entire world to read. My grandmother would be so proud!
Happy Holiday weekend!
Last weekend though I went to my friend Kate's birthday where I ran into a girl that I've met FOUR INDIVIDUAL times. Every time we've met, I've introduced myself to her, reminded her of the last time we met - and we've even taken a 5 hour acting workshop together, AND sat next to her during lunch and chatted. We have mutual friends, we're part of a small community - and YET - she continues to look at me as though she's never seen me before.
That's not the only instance. I find myself constantly reminding people of the last time we met. In fact, on Wednesday, I ran into a woman who remembered me first (embarassingly...although, at least I DID REMEMBER HER) and I wanted to kiss her on the face.
It's a strange thing - I know that I'm not quite the same boisterous, in your face girl that I used to be. I'm much calmer, perhaps even more diminutive these days. And the truth is, I'm dating an amazing man who is sort of a giant among the people he knows - he's kind and fun, well liked and respected...and perhaps I pale a little bit next to him, for the time being, my being new and all...
What's even weirder is the sheer number of strangers who feel like it's appropriate to tell me that I'd better be good enough for him...that they had hoped to be his girlfriend...and the like. Weird, right? Is it just me? Or is just not the South anymore?
Just a little ranting, please excuse me - it's just that these are the kind of behaviours that it's not exactly polite for me to call out - I could say something like, "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T REMEMBER ME? ARE YOU STUPID?" or "EXCUSE ME??!! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHAT KIND OF GIRLFRIEND TO BE? IS THAT ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS?" But I don't...I'm a good Southern girl - so I'll vent it here...for the entire world to read. My grandmother would be so proud!
Happy Holiday weekend!
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Collateral Damage
The truth will set you...
Free? Really? Or scared? Or lost...currently, the truth has set me lost. The search for truth. The desire for honesty. What is truth really? Isn't it *true* that each person's truth, by nature of our humanity, is going to differ? Then how does one discern when one is being lied to?
Why are we so afraid of being lied to? Because then we won't KNOW?! HA! Whoever gets to know anything absolutely. And how much duality is their to truth?
I remember having a conversation with Kelly and Seth on my mamma's front porch back in high school, we didn't fall asleep for one minute that night - just sat in the hammock, smoking our cloves and discussing TRUTH...and all things related.
Now here I am - 11 or so years later, and I'm no closer to understanding than I was that night. Sheesh - what a waste, I should have gotten some sleep! :) At least I quit smoking cloves. :)
I feel all discombobulated. I don't know what to think, or how to feel. I don't know how to stand on solid ground - how to not feel like every moment might bring some devastating new truth that will send me toppling down. I don't like this feeling, I'm very uncomfortable.
But I have the nagging sensation, somewhere deep down inside me - that MY TRUTH is the one that matters - the one that's going to lead me to that terra firma.
Still, I can't help but wonder - what is it that we're hiding from? Why do we hide from each other? If I know who I am, and I like who I am - and I feel or do something - what kind of sense does it make that I wouldn't be comfortable saying that I did it...I felt it?
Are we really just all hiding from ourselves? Is the rest of it collateral damage?
Free? Really? Or scared? Or lost...currently, the truth has set me lost. The search for truth. The desire for honesty. What is truth really? Isn't it *true* that each person's truth, by nature of our humanity, is going to differ? Then how does one discern when one is being lied to?
Why are we so afraid of being lied to? Because then we won't KNOW?! HA! Whoever gets to know anything absolutely. And how much duality is their to truth?
I remember having a conversation with Kelly and Seth on my mamma's front porch back in high school, we didn't fall asleep for one minute that night - just sat in the hammock, smoking our cloves and discussing TRUTH...and all things related.
Now here I am - 11 or so years later, and I'm no closer to understanding than I was that night. Sheesh - what a waste, I should have gotten some sleep! :) At least I quit smoking cloves. :)
I feel all discombobulated. I don't know what to think, or how to feel. I don't know how to stand on solid ground - how to not feel like every moment might bring some devastating new truth that will send me toppling down. I don't like this feeling, I'm very uncomfortable.
But I have the nagging sensation, somewhere deep down inside me - that MY TRUTH is the one that matters - the one that's going to lead me to that terra firma.
Still, I can't help but wonder - what is it that we're hiding from? Why do we hide from each other? If I know who I am, and I like who I am - and I feel or do something - what kind of sense does it make that I wouldn't be comfortable saying that I did it...I felt it?
Are we really just all hiding from ourselves? Is the rest of it collateral damage?
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Hanging on by the toenails.
I love my life. Everyday is a glorious surprise so full of delightful people and events...children who say beautiful things, new jobs, new experiences, finally the rich deep sun...I love my life.
But isn't it funny how somedays loving is such a given. You can't help but break into a giddy smile as you approach the airport...going just right AT the speed limit...there's no point in getting a ticket and further delaying your reunion...
And somedays it feels like every bone and muscle in you has given up on loving...is incapable. Just the basic exercise of remembering to smile at strangers, and keep that lilt in your voice while you talk to patrons - sending out all the love that you have into the universe, hoping against hope that by sending it out there, you might feel a little of it returned to you - refilling your coffers.
My coffers need refilling today. Bad.
But isn't it funny how somedays loving is such a given. You can't help but break into a giddy smile as you approach the airport...going just right AT the speed limit...there's no point in getting a ticket and further delaying your reunion...
And somedays it feels like every bone and muscle in you has given up on loving...is incapable. Just the basic exercise of remembering to smile at strangers, and keep that lilt in your voice while you talk to patrons - sending out all the love that you have into the universe, hoping against hope that by sending it out there, you might feel a little of it returned to you - refilling your coffers.
My coffers need refilling today. Bad.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Wishing I'd paid more attention in college...
This weekend, my beloved is in STL, visiting his darling daughter - and staying (also meeting) my soul sister and best college bud. What a wonderful opportunity for these amazing people to meet and get to know one another without all the pressure of "meeting the boyfriend/best friend" Especially after 2 years of buildup. They're hitting it off marvelously! In fact, she told me today that she even forgot he was my boyfriend and was just thinking how great it is to have this new friend and be hanging out with him. I couldn't have asked for more :) And yet...it's never easy for me to be told that I'd been forgotten. Is is so hard for me to remember myself? Ridiculous, isn't it?
I spent the day taking an inspiring and intoxicating workshop with members of the SITI company. Suzuki kicked my ass when I was 20... 8 years later, it hadn't gotten any kinder. But I understood the Viewpoints today - and it informed some work. I felt what was going on and saw the benefit of this work - and I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT. I wish I could go back to undergrad - where the SITI company and Anne Bogart herself came into my classroom to teach us workshops - where the company performed on our stage, where I had access to professors and artists whose JOB it was to tell me what they knew.
At the time, I didn't understand it. My heart, my body, and my mind weren't open to it. I was so afraid of not being good, or failing, or probably, working too hard - I wasted college. (Don't tell my dad!) I'd like to go back and do it over again, I'd pay more attention - I'd read all the plays I was supposed to (and save myself playing catch up with the cannon), I'd listen to every word that every professor said instead of crawling back up inside my shell and crying, "she just doesn't like me!" and I'd really learn.
Funny to me - I'm such an academic in some many ways. School is (more or less) easy for me. With the exception of chemistry, it always has been. I can write a paper quickly. I can discuss a book or a play or a theory. I was good at school.
But it took a really long time (and it was well after my matriculation) that I finally grasped what it was to learn.
WOW.
I spent the day taking an inspiring and intoxicating workshop with members of the SITI company. Suzuki kicked my ass when I was 20... 8 years later, it hadn't gotten any kinder. But I understood the Viewpoints today - and it informed some work. I felt what was going on and saw the benefit of this work - and I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT. I wish I could go back to undergrad - where the SITI company and Anne Bogart herself came into my classroom to teach us workshops - where the company performed on our stage, where I had access to professors and artists whose JOB it was to tell me what they knew.
At the time, I didn't understand it. My heart, my body, and my mind weren't open to it. I was so afraid of not being good, or failing, or probably, working too hard - I wasted college. (Don't tell my dad!) I'd like to go back and do it over again, I'd pay more attention - I'd read all the plays I was supposed to (and save myself playing catch up with the cannon), I'd listen to every word that every professor said instead of crawling back up inside my shell and crying, "she just doesn't like me!" and I'd really learn.
Funny to me - I'm such an academic in some many ways. School is (more or less) easy for me. With the exception of chemistry, it always has been. I can write a paper quickly. I can discuss a book or a play or a theory. I was good at school.
But it took a really long time (and it was well after my matriculation) that I finally grasped what it was to learn.
WOW.
Friday, April 4, 2008
I need a drink.
Or a Xanex...or something to still my world...
It's all so wonderful - the BEST things have been happening lately and I can't even stand it, it's all so heady and amazing. This blog is going to hardly be my literary best, but if I don't get some of these things out I just might burst.
So let's see...as you've heard - I'm wildly in love with the greatest man I've ever known. My best girl rocks and has some awesome news! :) I get to see 5 plays in one week. They are:
Gee's Bend - saw it, review to come soon
Frog & Toad - saw it, review to come soon
Dinner with Friends
Oleanna
The Merry Wives of Windsor
THEN...in the coming weeks we've also go tickets to Harvey...and we're going to see The Birthday Party...and Doubt. It's a good time for theatre.
So that's all great - but old news, right? Then, on top of that - I start teaching again tomorrow and I can't wait to be back with the little ones. I've added two new classes this session, so things promise to be challenging and exhilarating...
I've actually started making friends in Denver. ...and not just the kind where they're really B's friends, but it works out well that we all enjoy each others company either... some friends to have coffee or a drink with. Some friends to talk girl talk with.
TONIGHT - at midnight, I'm going to lose my Goonies virginity and see it on a big screen with a whole bunch of people who think it's cool to go see the Goonies at midnight on a Friday night. My kind of people indeed!
B. gave me roller skates for my birthday and they're AWESOME. I'm going skating soon - and I can't wait. I don't remember the last time I roller skated, but it was surely too long ago.
"SPRING IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER, TOAD!"
AND...the biggest and the most exciting news of all...we bought our tickets to Ireland today! B's performing in THE ZOO STORY in a tiny coastal town of Ireland with some other lovely Denver friends - and as of today, come hell or high water - we're going. Tickets are bought. We're going to Ireland in August! AWESOME.
In not so awesome news...my Uncle Danny suffered a pretty bad fall and is, as we say in MS, "tore up." They expect him to be unable to move really for about 10 weeks or so...so keep him, A.C. and the kiddos in your thoughts and prayers. They're pretty tough, and we're all so lucky that it wasn't worse - but they could certainly use some grace right about now.
Thanks for paying attention...play reviews and possibly some book reviews coming soon. Look out!
It's all so wonderful - the BEST things have been happening lately and I can't even stand it, it's all so heady and amazing. This blog is going to hardly be my literary best, but if I don't get some of these things out I just might burst.
So let's see...as you've heard - I'm wildly in love with the greatest man I've ever known. My best girl rocks and has some awesome news! :) I get to see 5 plays in one week. They are:
Gee's Bend - saw it, review to come soon
Frog & Toad - saw it, review to come soon
Dinner with Friends
Oleanna
The Merry Wives of Windsor
THEN...in the coming weeks we've also go tickets to Harvey...and we're going to see The Birthday Party...and Doubt. It's a good time for theatre.
So that's all great - but old news, right? Then, on top of that - I start teaching again tomorrow and I can't wait to be back with the little ones. I've added two new classes this session, so things promise to be challenging and exhilarating...
I've actually started making friends in Denver. ...and not just the kind where they're really B's friends, but it works out well that we all enjoy each others company either... some friends to have coffee or a drink with. Some friends to talk girl talk with.
TONIGHT - at midnight, I'm going to lose my Goonies virginity and see it on a big screen with a whole bunch of people who think it's cool to go see the Goonies at midnight on a Friday night. My kind of people indeed!
B. gave me roller skates for my birthday and they're AWESOME. I'm going skating soon - and I can't wait. I don't remember the last time I roller skated, but it was surely too long ago.
"SPRING IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER, TOAD!"
AND...the biggest and the most exciting news of all...we bought our tickets to Ireland today! B's performing in THE ZOO STORY in a tiny coastal town of Ireland with some other lovely Denver friends - and as of today, come hell or high water - we're going. Tickets are bought. We're going to Ireland in August! AWESOME.
In not so awesome news...my Uncle Danny suffered a pretty bad fall and is, as we say in MS, "tore up." They expect him to be unable to move really for about 10 weeks or so...so keep him, A.C. and the kiddos in your thoughts and prayers. They're pretty tough, and we're all so lucky that it wasn't worse - but they could certainly use some grace right about now.
Thanks for paying attention...play reviews and possibly some book reviews coming soon. Look out!
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